Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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