I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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