god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
