Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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