in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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