Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
