oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
