I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
