u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
P.S. I can't hear my feet
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
