JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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