I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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