absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
