so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
