it wasn't lemon gatorade
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
