my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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