It's like God shit irony all over that family
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
