he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
