im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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