does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
