I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
