I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I touched a dick in church today
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize