I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
