i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
