He asked me if I "almost moaned"
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
