please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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