garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize