I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
