Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize