mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i drank out of a bidet.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
