i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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