Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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