This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You're earring is so big in my mouth
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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