is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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