she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
