its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
one might say we're banned from that church
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
