so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
