I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
