We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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