That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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