shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
