i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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