Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
