I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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