I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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