I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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