Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Sober January is a disaster.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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