So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
this hospital has no fireball
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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