I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
