Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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