She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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