Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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